Peeze’s Playbook (Div 5) – Week 9

Montreal’s famed Ste. Catherine Street became a flood of green on Sunday afternoon.  As spectators watched through the lenses of chilled breath and a pervasive alcoholic haze, the St. Patrick’s Day Parade passed through one of the city’s oldest arteries for the 189^th time. 

 

As the day’s festivities wore on, I was reminded that this marked the inevitable arrival of Spring and thus, the inescapable end to the Winter 2013 season.  As week 9 has now concluded, we can truly begin to look unto the post-season as teams still fight and struggle to ensure their spot on the road to the championship. Many teams are still alive in this mad dash toward the playoffs.  Perhaps they have begun to imagine their own allegorical parade celebrating their supremacy. 

 

However, this may be somewhat precarious reverie for some, as those caught looking ahead will, inexorably, get stomped along the way.  Not unlike an early morning Irish Car-bomb*, underestimating one’s opponents may lead to an untimely exit from the festivities.  Hard work and careful game planning will need to be the top priority from here on out as we approach the final week of the season. 

 

*this is not intended to reference terrorist attacks typical of any radical or revolutionary sect or group.  Rather it is a cocktail served at many Irish Pubs in the city. A shot comprised of Bailey’s and Irish whiskey is dropped into a half a pint of Guinness and is intended to be consumed immediately, or ‘chugged’.  In responsible doses this cocktail serves as an elixir to enhance one’s charm.  If taken in large quantities that aforementioned charm quickly turns into a stumble down the stairs, arguments with cab drivers, loved ones, loss of one’s wallet, keys, gloves or cellphone, nausea, expulsion of the contents of one’s stomach, imminent hospitalization and then the feeling of inexplicable time lapse.

 

Weekly Overview

 

…and you thought my transitions were bad on Calling the Audible! 

 

Kingdom Oppress Cornerboys

 

Kingdom started off the season remarkably strong by going 2-0. After pushing the still undefeated Checkmate to the brink and losing a close one, Kingdom seemed to be somewhat deflated and went 2-4 in their next 6 games.  This week Kingdom came up big and handled the Hamsterdam Cornerboys. In the 34-24 victory, Kingdom looked as strong as a dude pulling a truck in a strongman competition. Brad Puklicz broke from his typical safe passing attack and took shots in this one.  The Cornerboys were not able to contain his number 1 target, Joseph Cecere who gained 92 yards on 5 catches.

 

One thing that amazed me in this game was a remarkable amount of missed flags.  While this plagued both teams throughout, this seemed to be Hamsterdam’s undoing.  Afdaal Martin had his best performance in week 9 and I hope it is something they can build on for next week. I hate seeing winless teams so I will be cheering for the powder-blues.

 

Mayhem Dine and Dash on Ecurie Bar et Tables

 

Norman Bellemare had a huge game throwing for 7 touchdowns and 271 yards.  5 receivers (Holowach, both Nowakoskis, Danny D’Amour and Terrence Adams) all caught touchdowns. Project Mayhem’s offense seems to be coming together and their ability to get yards after the catch makes them a very difficult team to beat.

 

Ecurie Bar et Tables were never really in this game from jump street.  Losing 47-24 would not have you believe otherwise. Anthony Bozzo is a great athlete and throws a very nice, catchable ball. There is a lot of inexperience on this team and this seems to be plaguing the team down the stretch.  Right now they are on the outside looking in in the playoff picture.  A win and some help will show us what they can do in the playoffs.

 

In Too Deep?

 

Ballz Deep really got one in there against Hangovers as they edged them out by a score of 25-24.  This may prove to have significant playoff implications as both teams are still fighting to earn a playoff spot.  Ballz Deep’s defense really stuck it to Bruno-Pierre Pelletier allowing him to complete only 9 passes all game long.  Conversely, Anthony Pitoscia kept hammering away at the Hangovers until the game finally reached its climax. His 149 yard, 4 touchdown game was enough to get it down this week.  Most impressively was that they were able to win the game without Treldon James.  Ballz Deep looks like they just may squeak into the playoffs.  To go really deep, they would need to have many more impressive outings such as this one.

 

Bruno-Pierre Pelletier had his second consecutive rough game and this time was not able to get away with it.  In fact, this game would not have even been this close if not for a pick-six by Pierre-Paul Gelinas. Interestingly, Hangovers leading receiver Patrice Clément, was left off of the offensive stat sheet.  I cannot imagine that they will beat the Aces this week if that were to become a trend.

 

J-Flo Overthrowned

 

The Overthrowners beat the Golden Girls 33-25. James Floreani actually looked human in this one as he was picked off 3 times, twice by Raphaël Ducas-Lapalme. Ducas-Lapalme added 2 touchdowns on 3 receptions and it pushed the Overthrowners to victory. In their last 5 games they are 3-1-1 and are doing what they can to hold on to the twelfth and final playoff spot.

 

The Golden Girls have been mathematically eliminated from the playoffs but now stand between Those Guys and a potential playoff berth.  Jonathan Rossie and Co. would love to play the spoilers in their week 10 game.

  

Warhawks: 2 and a Half Steps Behind

 

One thing has become clear over the course of the Warhawks season. The Winter 2010 championship runner-ups need some injection of speed to resurrect this once feared franchise.  Every time they have faced an opponent that is known for speedy receivers and dynamic defense the Warhawks have not been able to hold their ground. Brian Martin played well in this game, as he typically does (6 catches for 65 yards and 2 touchdowns) and defensively Andrew Jones led the charge with 6 tackles.  However, in order for them to see success in this new age in FPF, they will need to add some depth and quickness to their core.

 

Two and a Half Dans won this one 47-19 and the game was never even close. Joey Taylor made a case for his QB of the year nomination by throwing another 7 touchdowns. His top receiver and notably one of the full Dans, Danny Aylward caught three of those touchdowns and averaged 24 yards/catch.  Two and a Half Dans have not lost since week 4 and have looked stronger and stronger as the weeks have passed.

 

J’s Knock Down Those Guys

 

The J’s edged out Those Guys in a tight 27-24 battle.  Hai Minh Loung was effective as always and got points on the board when the J’s needed it most.  Le Boeuf Francais, Adrien Dusautois is known more so as a possession receiver around the league but he made his mark on defense in this game. Adrien had 5 tackles and 1 interception to lead the J’s defense in both categories. With both teams scoring 4 times each, the difference was converts. The J’s have shown a penchant for extra point success this season and this game was no exception.

 

Hemsley and the rest of Those Guys are currently battling for one of the last remaining playoff spots and will need some help to get in.  With 31 catches and 7 touchdowns this season, Francesco Martella has done his part to help his team this season. He will need to show up big against the Overthrowners this week.

 

Pre-Season Power Rankings

 

Prior to this season’s start, Simon and I came out with our pre-season Power Rankings.   As we did not know many of the rosters and we truly have less aptitude for prognostication than most people expect, the power rankings on week 9 look nothing like we had forecasted.  Upon review, here are my thoughts about the Pre-Season Power Rankings:

 

1. TCO- Despite having an up and down season, TCO still makes my power rankings on week 9.  
2. Project Mayhem- Leading Conference A, and being a presence on the power rankings week after week (with few exceptions), Project Mayhem have made me look good all season.
3. Love Cows- I truly cannot tell you why the Love Cows are in the situation that they are in. In terms of talent, there are few teams with a stronger roster.  All that ability has not translated to many wins.
4. Lockdown-They had a rough start but have fixed their personnel issues and seem to be on a war path.
5. Young Bloodz- Leading their division after 9 weeks, they aren’t in my power rankings but they have had a solid season thus far.  Let’s see if they can close it out.
6. Les Affreux- Have been a strong team all season.  Perhaps I was a little too conservative placing them at 6^th.
7. Flying Comics-They just haven’t put it together and have struggled more than in previous seasons.
8. Checkmate-Even I couldn’t have predicted that the Navy Blue Bombers would be undefeated after 9 weeks.  That’s why I ranked Checkmate at 8^th. Perhaps I made this pick convinced of my own false modesty.
9. Turf Toe Inc.-Truth be told, I had not noticed Kevin Lubin was on the roster when I made this pick.  They definitely should have been picked higher.

10. C Difficile- I thought Frank Kaye would be back from his injury.  I was right (albeit a few weeks late).  I thought this would have propelled C Difficile into the league’s top ten.  I was not right.

 

Power Rankings

 

Now that everyone can see that my opinions truly mean nothing, teams that are still alive and kicking can look to my power rankings and remind themselves that I have been wrong before.  In many cases I drew pictures of immortals only to see them fall from their divine dominions.

 

As of next week we will have the final standings and making arbitrary decisions about which teams I favor will become a moot point.  For this reason, this is my final installment of the Power Rankings for the winter 2013 season. It’s been fun and you’re bribes have been well spent on a constant flow of Hemingway’s Lemonade (Scotch, mostly the single malt variety). Once I’ve considered all those I reflect upon which players have complimented my good looks this season I decide who makes my top ten.  So here it is:

1. Checkmate- Since 2009 the lowest division in FPF has had an undefeated, regular season team in all but one season (Spring 2011 being the exception).  Will Checkmate be the next team name added to that list?
2. Black Ice- The Warhawks can’t be taken lightly if Black Ice wants to extend their winning streak to 7 games.
3. Turf Toe Inc.-Won by forfeit this week.  I guess sometimes you can win just by showing up.

1. Project Mayhem- With 86 points scored in the past two games Project Mayhem look ready for a fight. They jump up to 4 this week.
2. Lockdown- They’ve been the best team in the last 5 weeks.  Their schedule has been notably easier in the second half of the season but nonetheless I do not think their record is inflated.  Lockdown is looking like who we thought they were before the season started.

5. Les Affreux- They clinched their division but they’ve been in playoff mode for a while already.
6. Two and a Half Dans- Week after week the newbie’s continue to school veteran teams. 2.5 Dans, FTW!
7. Moose- Back to their winning form. With no hope of winning the division, Moose look to finish of the season in the upper end of the wildcard continuum.
8. First Downers- They are 2-2 in their last 4 games.  In this time frame, First downers have appeared fallible.  They will need to elevate their game in order to succeed in the playoffs.

10. TCO- Teflon Coated Orangutans are a very good, passionate team.  They play hard and looked like themselves once again this week. 

 

Other teams receiving votes (so many choices, so much better than two-party political systems):

• Cougars- I hesitated before even including the Cougars on this list.  Having lost 3 of their last four games it would appear that the Cougars are slipping fast.
• J’s- The J’s have already clinched their division but their week 10 game against Kingdom should prove to be a good preparation for the playoffs.
• Primes- Don’t look now but the Primes are the one of the hottest teams in the second half of the season.  This is due in large part to the performance of the self-proclaimed (and generally acknowledged) better-looking Iadeluca.
• Hangovers- They haven’t looked pretty in the past two weeks and they will need to start competing at a much higher level.  A loss in the final week may have the Hangovers spiraling out of the playoffs.
• Dark Knights- Handled a very good Aces squad and may have knocked Doug McKernan out of the running for QB of the year.
• Limetime- Limetime has now dropped two in a row.  Is this a sign that things may be unraveling?
• Speed Demons- Started strong, had a weak middle of the season, they seem to be back on track again.
• Aces-another loss to a playoff caliber team makes me skeptical.

 

New Faces

 

Phil Warlop – Young Bloodz

 

Warlop sacked the quarterback 4 times this past week and proved to be a worthy adversary for veteran quarterback, Mitchell Muir.  On the season, Phil Warlop has 13 sacks, which would be an impressive total for a veteran let alone a rookie. The Young Bloodz are a team that, despite leading their division, has had some difficulty, specifically on the defensive side of the ball. In Warlop, they have a centerpiece they can build around for seasons to come. If they can capitalize on his ability to rush, the Young Bloodz can be dangerous in the playoffs.

 

The League of Really Ordinary Gentlemen

 

With one week left in the league it seems to have turned into a two horse race between G.M. Kolethras and The Eagle at Master Control.  In my opinion, an Eagle should be disqualified in said race unless the horse was a Pegasus. I think with one miraculous week I can still take the lead back.  Boys, make Poppa Peeze proud. Here are the standings as we head into week 10:

 

Teams:

 

Pos.	G.M. Koletheras Dances with Love Cows	Peeze The Big Poppa Peezes	Simon Dagenais Dragonateurs	The Eagle Birds of Prey
QB.	(1)Doug McKernan (Aces)	(1) Mark Andre Theberge (First Downers)	(1)Frederic Morrissette (Moose)	(1)Joe Taylor (Two and a Half Dans)
QB.	(7)Mathieu Domon (Affreux)	(5)Simon Duchesne (Jaggerbomb)	(2) Shawn Lafortune (Les Maloudes)	(5) Brad Puklicz (Kingdom)
WR	(2)Tony Testa (Primes)	(2) Matthew Priess (Cougars)	(3)WR: Alexandre Chasse (Js)	(2)Michael  Carbone (Checkmate)
WR	(3)Frederic Fortier (First Downers	(3)Dave Daoust (Limetime)	(5)Jonathan Frate (Big Blue Wrecking Crew)	(3)Jonathan Legault (First Downers
WR	(4)Anthony Da Ponte (Black Ice)	(6)Alex Haddad (Young Bloodz)	(6) Simon Lahaie (Love Cows)	(4)Derek Daoust (Aces)
WR	(5)Andre Frederick (Tyrants)	(7)Patrice Clement (The Hangovers)	(7)Niel Etinson (Bearskins)	(7) James Nowakowski (Prj. Mayhem)
WR	(6)Emilio Cecere (Kingdom)	(8) Alex Lewis (Speed Demons)	(8) Akeem Hoyte-Charles (TCO)	(8) Suhael Brohi (X-Men)
DEF	(8)Checkmate	(4) Defense: Kingdom	(4) Turf Toe Inc	(6)Jaggerbomb
Scoring	1447.4	1325.6	1098.7	1453.0

 

*For information bout scoring please refer to Week 5 of my article, Peeze’s Playbook.

 

Reflections Rants and Ravings

 

• The Warriors showed up 5 minutes before halftime and the Manatees did not show up at all.  To be honest, this disappointed me a great deal.  We all pay to play in this league and no one wants to win by forfeit.
• In the preseason power rankings Simon Dagenais and I had 7 similar picks.  The team I least expected to be in the power rankings in week 9: Two and a Half Dans.
• Team Ethnik, Crooklyn Dodgers and Tyrants are all whose playoff absence surprises me.
• Dark Knights’ Bruce Candussi has thrown 15 touchdowns in the last two weeks!
• Am I the only one who has a genuine dislike for mascots?  They always seem to be hiding something.  No one can be that happy.
• Roughnecks end their season against TCO and the Hamsterdam Cornerboys end their against the James Floreani-led Golden Girls.  I really hope that at least one of these winless teams surprise me but I don’t think either will be adding a tally to their W column this season.  
• Do Saturday morning cartoons even exist anymore?  If not our youth is being robbed of the sophistication that can only be brought upon by the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

 

Predictions

 

So after going 15/24 this week, as compared to Simon’s exceptional 18/24 it would seem that now would be a time to gracefully accept defeat.  However, I am not graceful and I do not accept it.  I want a recount (especially if given the chance to manipulate the facts).  Recount pending, Simon leads my 116-76 with his dominant 131-61.  Here are my picks this week:

 

Cougars vs Project Mayhem

Jaggerbomb vs Les Albatros 

Rougnecks vs TCO

Warriors vs Big Blue Wrecking Crew

J’s vs Kingdom : Kingdom

Green Lantern Corps vs Venom

Moose vs Fools of the Country

Centurions vs Les Affreux

Speed Demons vs Loose Cannons

Two and a half Dans vs Limetime 

Hamsterdam Cornerboys vs Golden Girls

The Hangovers vs Aces

Overthrowners vs Those Guys

Team Ethnik vs Ballz Deep

First Downers vs Dark Knights

Pendant Publishing vs Turf Toe Inc.

Tyrants vs X-Men

Black Ice vs Warhawks

C’mon Man !  vs. Lockdown

Dolphins vs Manatees

Young Bloodz vs Love Cows

BearSkins vs Primes

C Difficile vs Les Maloudes

Ecurie Bar et Tables vs Crooklyn Dodgers 

 

Playoff Picture

 

Now that we have said goodbye to a few more teams and welcomed a few into the post-season the playoff picture becomes clearer still.  However, with so many spots up for grabs head-to-head results and divisional records will come into play in a huge way.  On several podcasts, I mentioned that there was more depth in Conference A while B was more top heavy.  With so many more teams in the hunt in Conference A and with so many more teams clinching a playoff berth in Conference B, my hypothesis seems to have been accurate.  Here is where we stand:

 

Conference A		Points	Wins	+/-	Divisional
1	Project Mayhem (X)	14	7	108	4-0
2	Les Affreux (X)	14	7	32	4-0
3	First Downers (X)	14	7	96	2-1
4	Young Bloodz	8	4	27	3-1
5	Primes (X)	13	6	1	3-1
6	TCO (X)	12	6	108	3-1
7	Cougars	12	6	85	3-1
8	Lockdown	12	6	14	2-2
9	Dark Knights	12	5	43	2-1
10	Les Maloudes	10	5	56	2-2
11	Les Albatros	10	5	33	2-2
12	Jaggerbomb	10	5	-19	2-2
13	Centurions	10	5	-2	1-3
14	Ecurie Bar Et Tables	10	5	-14	1-3
15	Green Lantern Corps	8	4	8	1-3
16	C Difficile	8	4	-15	1-3
17	Love Cows	7	3	-17	3-1
18	C’Mon Man!	7	3	-48	2-1
19	Crooklyn Dodgers	7	3	-109	0-4
20	X-Men	6	3	-29	3-1
21	Tyrants	6	3	-7	2-2
22	Team Ethnik	6	3	29	2-3
23	BearSkins	4	2	-67	1-3
24	Venom	3	1	-142	0-4
25	Roughnecks	0	0	-230	0-4

 

 

Conference B		Points	Wins	+/-	Divisional
1	Checkmate (X,Y)	18	9	170	4-0
2	Black Ice (X)	16	8	97	4-0
3	Turf Toe Inc (X,Y)	15	7	116	4-0
4	J’s (X, Y)	13	6	25	3-0-1
5	Two and a Half Dans(X)	16	8	144	3-1
6	Moose (X)	14	7	139	2-2
7	Aces (X)	12	6	89	2-1
8	Limetime (X)	12	6	109	1-3
9	Speed Demons	11	5	50	3-1
10	Kingdom	10	5	13	3-1
11	The Hangovers	10	5	25	2-1
12	Overthrowners	9	4	-29	2-1-1
13	Flying Comics	9	4	28	2-2
14	Those Guys	9	4	38	1-3
15	Ballz Deep	8	4	-64	2-2
16	Big Blue Wrecking Crew	8	4	-22	1-3
17	Pendant Publishing	7	3	-23	2-1
18	Golden Girls	6	3	-3	2-2
19	Warhawks	6	3	-66	2-2
20	Warriors	6	3	-93	0-4
21	Loose Cannons	4	2	-99	2-2
22	Dolphins	4	2	-74	1-3
23	Fools of the Country	2	1	-122	0-4
24	Manatees	2	1	-231	0-5
25	Hamsterdam Cornerboys	0	0	-158	0-4

 

 

*X denotes having clinched a playoff spot.

**Y denotes having one division

***This chart and any fact associated to it have been brought to you by: the letter A, the number 17 and the Eagle at Master Control.

 

The Weekly Wrap Up

 

So with one more week to go before the playoffs begin I would like to remind you that for all concerns about the quality of this article can be addressed to Simon Dagenais ([email protected]).  Any comments about how awesome I am can be sent directly to me @ [email protected] or on Twitter @PeezeFPF.

 

Tell your family, tell your friends, the hottest podcast (according to everyone who listens to it) is Calling the Audible. Subscribe now via iTunes or download it at http://fpf.podomatic.com. This week, we talk about which teams are still alive and which teams are most likely to be affected by the bye week.  We will be hosting an out-and-out round table featuring FPF analysts and Dream Killing, Cow Admirer, GM Kolethras, Mayhem inducing Alex Holowach (A man with #NoRegard for societal order), and two Spartans in the realm of Chess: Alex David and Julien Belleavance. Joining us will be Kendal Myers of Dark Knights.  This week’s musical theme is: Questing with Peeze!