Deuxième et Court (Div D) – Semaine 9 (English)

This is it—Week 10. For most teams, there’s nothing left to play for at this point but pride or, for those fortunate enough to have already clinched a postseason appearance, a better playoff seed. But for those few teams whose fate has yet to be determined, this week is make-or-break—and promises to make for some wild games. We’ll explore each of those teams’ possible playoff-clinching scenarios in a minute, but first, let’s take a look back at the Sunday that was.

 

Recap

 

Le Zoo Get Morissetted 

 

That’s right, I just made a verb out of Fred Morissette’s name. Morissetting: the action of throwing 100 deep passes en route to a billion passing yards, another billion touchdowns, and three billion points. 

 

Okay, the definition may be a work in progress, but the point remains that this week, it was Le Zoo’s turn to feel the wrath of Morissette’s cannon arm in a 51-20 blowout. The game mostly consisted of the following: Morissette receiving the snap from his own 10-yard line, taking one step, and throwing a bomb to James Floreani for a touchdown.

 

It led to 310 passing yards and eight touchdowns to just one interception for Morissette, with Floreani on the receiving end of 135 of those yards and four of those touchdowns. 

 

Le Zoo’s offence, built around short passes and third down conversions, simply wasn’t able to keep up, with quarterback Frank Kaye’s deep ball attempts leading to four interceptions on the night. 

 

While the win clinched a playoff appearance for Checkmate, unfortunately they may not be Morissetting teams anymore this season, as Morissette apparently will no longer be able to play the rest of the season due to scheduling conflicts. 

 

Jaggerbombs ineffective in hostile territory 

 

In a matchup primed to be a tug-of-war to the end, this game ended up looking more like a chihuahua trying to take on a lion, as Hostile Territory blew Jaggerbomb out of the water in a 46-6 thrashing.

 

Jaggerbomb quarterback Jeremie Gauthier was as powerless through the air as on the ground, managing just 9-for-20 passing for 30 yards and one touchdown with four interceptions, while rushing just twice for 22 yards. 

 

Much of his struggles were the direct result of the nearly flawless rushing from Didier Perriault-Dorzile, who was rewarded for his efforts with not only two sacks—including one for a safety—but also perhaps the play of the season when he forced Gauthier back to his own one-yard line, jumped up to bat Gauthier’s pass, caught the ball himself and ran into the endzone for the score. 

 

As for Jaggerbomb, the play marked just the latest blunder for a team that has gone 1-3-2 since starting the season 3-0. 

 

Les Affreux stumble into the wrong playground 

 

It was bound to happen. 

 

After flying past nearly every team in their path the first six weeks of the season, Les Affreux’s invincibility shield began cracking when they needed to overcome a five-point halftime deficit against Pardon My Swag in week seven, then an 11-point halftime deficit against BMS the following game. 

 

It finally fell off completely, as they fell 27-13 to Playground this past Sunday. 

 

As was the case the past few weeks, Les Affreux got off to a slow start, with errant passes, dropped balls and sloppy defence leading to an 18-7 halftime deficit. 

 

But unlike in previous weeks, they couldn’t right the ship in the second half, with Jonathan Lemieux going just 7-of-17 for 23 yards with one touchdown and an interception before being knocked out in a Playground victory that has breathed new life into their playoff hopes. 

 

Race to the playoffs

 

Copy-pasted from the website: 

 

Conference A

 

1. Centurions* (9-0, 18 pts, 4-0, 77 PA): Ballz Deep

2. Les Affreux* (8-1, 16 pts, 2-1, 174 PA, H2H over Blue Mountain State): Black Ice

3. Mongoose* (6-3, 12 pts, 3-0, 194 PA): Limetime

4. Blue Mountain State* (8-1, 16 pts, 2-1, 134 PA): Playground

5. Limetime* (6-3, 12 pts, 3-0, 220 PA): Mongoose

6. Bearskins (5-4, 10 pts, 2-2, 274 PA): X-Men

7. Wheel of Fish (5-4, 10 pts, 0-3, 275 PA): Lockdown

8. Lockdown (3-3-3, 9 pts, 1-2, 272 PA): Wheel of Fish

 

9. Playground (4-5, 8 pts, 2-1, 251 PA, H2H over Shamrocks): Blue Mountain State

10. Shamrocks (4-5, 8 pts, 2-1, 242 PA): Warriors

11. Black Ice (3-5-1, 7 pts, 0-3, 303 PA): Les Affreux

 

12. Pardon My Swag (3-6, 6 pts, 1-2, 274 PA): Underdogs

13. Underdogs (2-7, 4 pts, 1-2, 282 PA): Pardon My Swag

14. Big Blue Wrecking Crew (1-7-1, 3 pts, 1-3, 302 PA): Park-X Streets

15. Warriors (0-8-1, 1 pt, 0-3, 273 PA): Shamrocks

 

Conference B

 

1. Longhorns* (8-1, 16 pts, 2-1, 146 PA): Jaggerbomb

2. Gotham Knights* (6-3, 12 pts, 3-0, 199 PA, H2H over Checkmate): Le Zoo

3. X-Men* (5-3-1, 11 pts, 3-1, 235 PA): Bearskins

4. Hostile Territory* (7-2, 14 pts, 3-0, 179 PA): Tyrants

5. Checkmate* (6-3, 12 pts, 2-1, 263 PA): Black Mambas

6. Le Zoo* (5-2-2, 12 pts, 1-1-1, 238 PA): Gotham Knights

7. Jaggerbomb* (4-3-2, 10 pts, 1-1-1, 237 PA): Longhorns

8. Vikings (4-5, 8 pts, 1-2, 184 PA): Project Mayhem

 

9. Ballz Deep (3-5-1, 7 pts, 1-2-1, 247 PA): Centurions

10. Project Mayhem (3-5-1, 7 pts, 1-2, 325 PA): Vikings

 

11. Ghosts (3-6, 6 pts, 2-1, 279 PA): Speed Demons

12. Tyrants (2-6-1, 5 pts, 0-2-1, 248 PA): Hostile Territory

13. Speed Demons (1-7-1, 3 pts, 1-2, 252 PA): Ghosts

14. Park-X Streets (1-7-1, 3 pts, 1-3, 288 PA): Big Blue Wrecking Crew

15. Black Mambas (2-7, 4 pts, 0-3, 277 PA): Checkmate:

 

Playoff-clinching scenarios for each team still in contention (not copy-pasted from the website):

 

Conference A

 

Bearskins: win or lose + Playground and/or Shamrocks loss 

 

Wheel of Fish: win or lose + Playground and Shamrocks loss 

 

Lockdown: win or lose + Playground, Shamrocks and Black Ice loss 

 

Playground: win 

 

Shamrocks: win + Playground and/or Bearskins loss

 

Black Ice: win + Shamrocks, Playground and Lockdown loss

 

Conference B

 

Vikings: win

 

Project Mayhem: win 

 

Ballz Deep: win + Vikings and Project Mayhem tie + finish with fewer PA than Vikings 

*with the exception of Ballz Deep, these don’t include ties for the sake of time and my sanity 

 

Fantasy Football

Somehow, despite yet another abysmal performance by the Wheel of Fish defence and the fact that quarterback Kevin Gauthier didn’t throw a single pass this week, terry tam is still in first place of the standings. Equally as absurd, Eagle won the most points for the second week in a row, celebrating them both by littering this week’s podcast with eurotrash music.

 

The current standings:

 

Team	QB	WR	Def	Flex	Total	Last Week	Difference
Terry	483.40	719.60	198.67	122.40	1524.07	1348.90	175.17
Eagle	582.90	622.60	186.00	124.40	1515.90	1318.67	197.23
Justin	489.30	589.80	230.33	111.37	1420.80	1303.73	117.07
GM	549.20	439.20	182.33	147.00	1317.73	1214.40	103.33
Peeze	515.90	441.00	143.33	142.13	1242.37	1182.10	60.27
Simon	438.40	501.80	165.33	126.53	1232.07	1134.00	98.07
Mat	408.60	403.40	150.17	251.43	1213.60	1076.83	136.77

 

Well, at least I’m still ahead of Peeze in the standings.

 

Quick picks

 

Another competition in which I’m also ahead of Peeze. A 9-5 record this past week gives me 80-46 on the season, while Peeze lags behind at 60-38 after failing to make any picks two weeks in a row (about to be three). 

 

Gotham Knights vs. Le Zoo: Gotham Knights

Black Ice vs. Les Affreux: Les Affreux

Wheel of Fish vs. Lockdown: N/A

Checkmate vs. Black Mambas: Checkmate

Ballz Deep vs. Centurions: Centurions

Park-X Streets vs. Big Blue Wrecking Crew: Big Blue Wrecking Crew

Playground vs. Blue Mountain State: Playground

Project Mayhem vs. Vikings: Project Mayhem

Hostile Territory vs. Tyrants: Hostile Territory

Mongoose vs. Limetime: Mongoose

Ghosts vs. Speed Demons: Speed Demons

Longhorns vs. Jaggerbomb: Longhorns

Underdogs vs. Pardon My Swag: Pardon My Swag

Shamrocks vs. Warriors: Shamrocks

X-Men vs. Bearskins: Bearskins

***

You know the drill. Email is [email protected], Twitter @JBlanch6. The latest Division D podcast is at http://fpf.podomatic.com, where you can listen to Terry Tam and I interview Black Mamba’s Fadel Assane, give our thoughts on the remaining playoff races, and struggle through a whole lotta awkward silences. Enjoy it, because next week it’s back to the atrocity that is Peeze. I’m shuddering at the thought.